"Horatio, the victim had a phone jammed up his ass, he almost died"
"Then it looks..."
*stands up and puts glasses on*
"...it was a close call"
YEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Horatio, the female victim was actually storing cocaine inside her breast implants when she was murdered"
"Well...i guess we'll call this one...
*Puts on Sunglasses*
...a drug bust"
YYYYEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Horatio, the killer used pokemon cards to lure the girl to his van where he raped her.
"Well...
It looks like....
*Puts on sunglasses*
It was super effective
YEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Horatio, we found a girl dead with her eye poked out and semen in her skull.
Horatio: Well, it look like...
*puts on sunglasses*
she didn't see it coming.
YEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Horatio, we found the skeleton just outside the highschool. It was reported by a group of students going to prom.
"Well...
it looks like somebody...
*puts on sunglasses*
had no body to go with."
YEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Horatio, the victim appears to have been smothered to death with a Doritos bag.
Well, it looks like...
*Puts on sunglasses*
She's all that and a bag of chips.
YEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Horatio, it seems the victims whole left side was cut off, chainsaw seems like the weapons of choice"
"Well, it looks like the victim....."
*Puts on sunglasses*
"Is all right now"
YEEEEAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Horatio, semen was found in the victim's mouth.
"Well the truth is always..."
*puts on sunglasses*
"... hard to swallow"
YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Horatio, it appears as though the woman was hit and killed by a car.
"Well why was the murderer..."
*puts on sunglasses*
"... driving in the kitchen?"
YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Horatio I'm dying."
"Well, then"
*puts on sunglasses*
"CHICKEN BLBJAHBBGL GGHGHGHG"
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sir, the victim had a card on him with the name, Quasimodo.
"Well it seems that this murderer...
*puts on sunglasses*
...had a hunch."
YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mr. Caine, they just extracted the body from the mineshaft. He was found crushed underneath a piano, which someone had pushed down.
It sounds like that piano...
*Puts on sunglasses*
...was playing in the key "A-Flat Minor."
YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Horatio! This guy had his penis in a jar of penut butter!"
Well i guess you can say
*sunglasses*
Our victem was fucking nuts"
YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Horatio, victims were found on both floors of the building with stab wounds."
"Well I guess this case...".
*Puts on sunglasses*
"Has two stories."
YEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*Victim is found in an elevator*
Horatio "Well it looks like this case
*puts on sunglasses*
is going to have its ups and downs...
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Horatio! this guy got shot while he was performing on stage!
well i guess he was...
*puts on sunglasses*
caught in the act.
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
horatio the professor was killed in the history class
well i guess he's...
*puts on sunglasses*
HISTORY
YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH