Death or No Death

"Hello, my name is Frank Stein and welcome to Death or No Death, the game where you might die. And now, here's our host, Popo Neso!" As the announcer onstage announced him, Menaldi Osen suddenly materialized and cut his head off. "You're fired. And now for the rules. I have created 10 obstacles for you to face, and you must face them. However, should you be a whiny baby, you have two other options. One, you quit with the money you have, or two, you use one of three spell cards, Pass, self-explanitory, Call a friend, if he fails, you win, if he survives, you die, or weaken, where we make it easier. If you pass all 10, then you get 1,000,000 dollars, now lets meet our first contestant! Come on down!" Menaldi announced as his audience, mostly filled with Ryu-Zaraki's, cheered for the cntestant

Natsu, who had lost a dare to Ryuunosuke Yuuki, slowly got on stage.

"Hating to be here, Osen. As always, it's anything but a pleasure to see you. So, what bogus games will you have me play today?" he asked with a sigh.

Yuuki, who materialized next to Menaldi whispered into Menaldis ear "Don't go easy on him", handing Menaldi a bribe of eleventy billion dollars.

Menaldi whispered back to him, "I wasn't planning to... but I'm still keeping the money." Just then, the money poofed away to Osen's hammerspace. "Now, as for you Natsu, you have a special task. Did you know that Mario's first appearance was in Donkey Kong. Well, I hope you know how to play because that's what the first challenge is!"

"You will have to use the platforms and ladders to get up to the princess, without getting hit by the bouncing, antimatter barrels, which will end you on contact. Then once you reach the top, that's where the fun starts."

"You will then have to fight Donkey Kong, who will try to knock you off of the structure. You must defeat him for only then can you save the princess. If you lose, you die, and the princess gets thrown off of the tower to her doom. However, since I'm awesomesauce, I will allow you to pick who the princess shall be."

Osen smirked, waiting to hear who Natsu would choose to put in danger, "And of course, if you think this is too dangerous for you, you can always use one of your Spell cards..." he trailed off.

"The part of the Princess shall be played by Menaldi Osen!" Natsu yelled. He didn't plan on saving Menaldi, even if it meant death. Especially if it would mean death to Menaldi.

"Also, I've paid Mario himself to take my place in this little game. Oh, and Yuuki tricked you. There's no amount called 'elevently billion dollars' - you got h4x0r3d."

Menaldi Osen, smirked as he already knew he would do this. "Well, I, your host, Popo Neso am suprised how he found away to skip the challenge without using the spell card, however, it's still legal. Summoning jutsu!"

Menaldi announced as he summoned a person who looked exactly like him, except that that person was wearing a sleeveless shinigami uniform and had a different blade and no sheath. "Alright 'Menaldi,' are you ready?" "Yes, Neso-taicho," Menaldi responded. "And you, Mario?" "Let'sa go!" Mario responded.

Mario was easily getting up the structure. Just as Mario had made it to the top, Donkey Kong had taken out his phone and dial four numbers before the phone disappeared and anti-matter barrels covered Donkey Kong's body.

"Umm... I give?" Mario said shyly, as Donkey Kong cornered him and then touched him with a single finger and ended him before Donkey Kong could turn aroud, he heard a, "Please, allow me." as Menaldi jumped off of the platform, surviving only because he was a soul reaper. "I, your host, didn't that coming. Well, since Mario died, you win! However, next time you try that cheap trick I'll be taking away your Call a friend spell card. Not cool dude! And now, I'll be taking suggestions from the audience," Menaldi, the host, announced, hoping someone would think of something brutal.

An audience member stood up. "Yeah, recently we've had some trolls who have tried to be approved but luckily were shot down. I'd like to see the contestants read through those people's applications without showing any sign that they are suffering from reading them... I'm sorry, but maybe that's TOO cruel. What do you think?" The member quietly sat back down as the audience of Ryu Zaraki's glared at him.

The other announcer, Borat, agreed with the idea. "I think it's-a very niiice." Without another word, Borat pointed to the next contestant and laid the applications out on a table, directing the contestant to sit down and begin to read.

"Ah yes, the next contestant. I thought we were only doing one at a time. Well, you know Sendo, always changing stuff. But let's welcome our next contestant!" He looked over at Borat and telepathically said, 'Let's keep the number of contestants out at once to 1, 2 at most, k? Though you're doing a terrific job, better than the last guy.' Menaldi then pointed to the floor where the dead body of the last one was.

Stepping onto the stage a very pissed off Ranryou would just stand still glaring at the Ryuzaraki's. God did he hate that guy. Turning his attention to the judges Ranryou glared at them all.

"So what the hell am I supposed to do?"

"Well Rogs, for 100 dollars, read the apps of Ryuzaraki, Lucario, Elendril, and Zaquri, without showing any discomfort or suffering from them. I, Popo Neso, wouldn't do that even if my life was on the line, which it is for you Mr. Ranryou Roga. Howeva, you are allowed to use one of your spell cards. Borat you stay here with Roga while I show Natsu his next challenge. And on second thought, you keep announcing more people, forget what i said before."

Popo walked over to a new part. "Now Natsu, this one is actually simple, I'm thinking of 5 numbers, 1-10. Guess right, live to see 200, guess wrong, die with nothing. Let's play, and as always, you can use one three spell cards. GO!!!" Popo announced.

Sighing under his breathe Ranryou picked up Zaquri's profile.

"Name.........Zaquri."

Instantly Ranryou turned into a gaseous cloud of epic discomfort. That gas dispersing with the wind.

"One, three, five, seven and nine. If you want to keep the use of your arms and legs, you'll agree with me, Popo." The words after the numbers were said in such a low voice only Popo could hear them.

Natsu was deffinitely NOT happy to be here, but that stupid dare he'd made with Yuuki forced him to play along. At least for a little while.

Popo Neso watched as Roga disintergrated, suprised at his reaction. "Well then..." He was so distracted by this that he had forgot what numbers he had thought of and didn't hear a word clearly. "Umm... correct?" He said, still baffled by Roga's destruction.

"Anyway, now it's time... for the coin toss. Call it in the air or use a spell card!" He said as he tossed a coin in the air.

Natsu closed his eyes and declared "Tails" while it was still in mid-air.

In the meantime, Yuuki went to whisper something into Borats ear. "Wouldn't it be much more fun if the next contestant had to read Twilight without blinking once in 60 seconds?"

Borat looked at Yuuki, surprised that a random person was directly speaking to an announcer. "Well... I will think about it, my friend with the bad haircut." Borat gestured to the denied profiles still laying on the table. "We still need more foolish contestants to bleed their eyes out and then be robbed by Gypsies because they are blind, ya?" With that, Borat pointed to the next contestant to brave this gargantuan task.

"... It's heads." Sendo watched as Popo Neso announced that Natsu lost. "Yo dude, did he win?" Kane, his roommate chimed in, reminding him of their bet. "Umm..." Sendo replied, accepting that Kane won. At least until he realized that he controlled the network. He dialed Popo's cell while reclining his chair. "Yo, Po-man! Whassup! Hey listen, let's make a deal. If you say that that coin landed on tails, I won't kill you through the phone." Sendo watched the scared look on his face as he announced that the coin was actually tails. "Yo man, he win?" Kane asked again. "Yeah man, look for yourself." "Naw, man can't you see I'm playing Modern Warfare 2 online, you crazy!" "Naw, you crazy!" Sendo rebutted.

Popo looked over back at Natsu. "So anyway, what's our next challenge for Natsu, Borat, and is that a new challenger?"

Just then, out of Borat's shadow flew a man seemingly madeout of darkness.
"What in Satan's glorious name...This isn't Lasconni's bathroom closet! Fucking cheap-ass shadow power. That's what I get for buying it from Gypsies. Yo, Mr. Gay Prison Mustache..." he called to Borat, "How do I get out of here?"

"Why would you want to leave when you can risk your life for 1,000,000 dollars? Come on, play." Popo knew that ratings would go up if they had someone that hollows could relate to. After all, they were the only race that you couldn't find in the audience currently. "Borat, need a challenge."